Newspaper columnist and minister George Crane tells of a wife who came into his office full of hatred toward her husband. "I do not only want to get rid of him, I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has me."
Dr. Crane suggested an ingenious plan "Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every decent trait. Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible. Spare no efforts to please him, to enjoy him. Make him believe you love him. After you've convinced him of your undying love and that you cannot live without him, then drop the bomb. Tell him that you're getting a divorce. That will really hurt him." With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, "Beautiful, beautiful. Will he ever be surprised!"
And she did it with enthusiasm. Acting "as if." For two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcing, sharing. When she didn't return, Crane called. "Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?"
"Divorce?" she exclaimed. "Never! I discovered I really do love him."
Mini habit: Ons gedrag verander dikwels one gevoelens. "Motion " loop uit op "emotion." Ons vermoë om lief te hê kom dikwels tot stand, nie soseer deur 'n besluit nie, maar deur goed wat ons oor en oor doen - little habits. Miskien is daar 'n rol by die werk, 'n projek, 'n verhouding waarin jy kan voorgee totdat die klein gewoonte 'n werklikheid begin raak.
Dr. Crane suggested an ingenious plan "Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every decent trait. Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible. Spare no efforts to please him, to enjoy him. Make him believe you love him. After you've convinced him of your undying love and that you cannot live without him, then drop the bomb. Tell him that you're getting a divorce. That will really hurt him." With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, "Beautiful, beautiful. Will he ever be surprised!"
And she did it with enthusiasm. Acting "as if." For two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcing, sharing. When she didn't return, Crane called. "Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?"
"Divorce?" she exclaimed. "Never! I discovered I really do love him."
Mini habit: Ons gedrag verander dikwels one gevoelens. "Motion " loop uit op "emotion." Ons vermoë om lief te hê kom dikwels tot stand, nie soseer deur 'n besluit nie, maar deur goed wat ons oor en oor doen - little habits. Miskien is daar 'n rol by die werk, 'n projek, 'n verhouding waarin jy kan voorgee totdat die klein gewoonte 'n werklikheid begin raak.
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